This poem was written to my wife in the year 2000. It speaks for itself.
Subtitled My Bride
I really am a good guy you know
I just didn’t understand the meaning of go slow
I took no prisoners, made all the fast breaks
I didn’t realise I was making mistakes
I chipped all the corners, scratched all the edges
Like a maniac attacking a pair of box hedges
Without concern for the bed I was making
I roused up the dragon, from sleep she was waking
Like lightning striking from a clear cloudless sky
I was hit! “why me?” was my responsive cry
“what did I do?” or “was it my lack?”
but no answer was forthcoming back
I pleaded, cajoled, ranted and raved
It was like talking to oneself in an empty cave
The dragon lay brooding, considering my case
And I unaware was making mistakes
I should have known better, should have learnt from the past
But sometimes that’s tricky when life’s going so fast
To take time to think – why how would that leave
Time for the rest when you live life at speed
The answer came like a brick from the sky
Smote me on the forehead, right between the eyes
Just shut your big gob and listen you lout
Maybe that way some things you’d find out
About this passionate warm loving creature
She isn’t a dragon just about to eat you
But rather a fragrance, a gentle breeze
The sort that can appear then disappear with ease
To find her is rewarding, like uncovering treasure
She’s challenging, my mate, she’s sure got my measure
And if I take the time and effort to discover
She’ll probably morph into a passionate lover
I guess what I'm saying is that it’s not always easy
Sometimes I live like everything’s breezy
I really should be stopping to think and to ponder
How I can nurture my soul mate and wonder
Why do I hurt her when I only ever
Want to love her with all my endeavours
This lady this special girl by my side
Hey there gorgeous, will you still be my bride?
© 2000 Timothy Miller
I wrote this in 1999. I have no memory of writing it, or the circumstances that led to writing such painful words. I am absolutely sure it was not about my wife – I suspect it may have been about a friend who had some massive issues at that time.
Anyway here it is.
Done It Again
Words like twisted, painful and bitter
Aren't the words for a passionate lover
How I feel is broken and battered
Rejected, despised - I think I've been worked over
You set me up
I gave you my time, my heart, my caring
You said our love was honest and daring
After all my heartfelt devotion
You filled my head with violent emotion
You set me up
You lied, you cheated, you told me it was nothing
My friends all saw that I was hurting
I laughed it off and tried to ignore them
I squashed down the pain and tried not to listen
You set me up for a broken heart
© Timothy Miller 1999
We are praising God for the healthy birth of William Kind Miller on May 14th at 5:05am. He weighed in at a healthy 3.860kg (8 pounds, 7 ounces) and was able to go home the day he was born. He has been a delight to us already as we’ve had the last two weeks to start to get to know him. He only has two tasks, to eat and sleep, and we are pleased that he does both quite well! Our boys are a blessing that we don’t take for granted.
The COUNTDOWN is on!
July 27th. We are flying out of Sydney in 45 days to start slowly making our way to Central Asia. First stop is Kyiv! We are looking forward to having some time traipsing around Europe on our way to our new home in the mountains. We want to say a huge thanks to everyone who has made us meals, helped us pack up our things, and watched our kids. We love all our friends here and are looking forward to seeing you all before we leave. We’re not leaving forever, we’ll be back to say hello before you know it!
I know that some women really love being pregnant, but I must say, I much prefer the newborn phase! I don’t feel nearly as tired as I remember being when Jonny was this age. I know that having Jono at home taking care of the housework and entertaining Jonny makes a huge difference. And it’s been really lovely to see so many friends sign up to cook meals for us! We have been loving all the visits and just generally enjoying life as a family of four. Jono has been back at work for two weeks now, but his parents came for most of that time, and now my mom is here from the States, so I’m well taken care of. I feel a bit spoiled by all the help everyone is giving me. Thanks.
Jonny Peace’s Piece
I love to give baby Will a kiss on the head whenever I can. I’m still working out that I’m not supposed to step or crawl on him. But I found out that he can sleep even if I jump on the bed next to him. I try to share my toys but he’s not that interested. He takes up a lot of mama’s time, but that’s ok, cause daddy takes me out for walks and sometimes we even get a coffee. I love all the visitors that keep coming because they bring muffins and cakes and cookies. As soon as someone comes to the door, I show them straight to the dining room table!
Jono, Marie, Jonny and Will Miller
William Kind Miller arrived three days early on the 14th of May. He and mum are both doing well and are now at home. Visitors welcome!
The Cat’s in the Cradle
I received the following text message from Marie today. “He just tried shaving his face with your razor. It was kind of cute. And scary. But cute. He wants to be like his Daddy.” The way Jonny imitates me is flattering. From the words he says, to the way he walks, to what he does with his hands. He is going to grow up just like me! I hope he can recognise the gold and dodge the dross. God is still refining me.
Life in the Big Smoke
April felt like a massive month. We finished Term 1 after eleven weeks of teaching and headed north to Brisbane. We had time with friends and family which is always short lived but much appreciated.
We came back to Sydney, packed up our house and moved from Beecroft to Eastwood. I now have a slightly longer commute to work, but we are blessed to be in a furnished house with three bedrooms. We now have room for baby #2 as well as overseas guests coming to see grandchildren. We would love to have visitors come and have a tea or coffee with us before we leave.
We’d like to say a huge thank you to everyone who helped set up, run, attended, looked after Jonny and packed up for our afternoon tea last Saturday. It was a real encouragement for us to see so many of our friends from different parts of our lives there. We have been blessed by your friendship more than we can say. It’s amazing to be part of such a supportive community.
The COUNTDOWN is on!
May 17th is our son’s due date, that’s less than two weeks! Lots of people have been asking if we’re ready and I struggle to know how to answer that. We have all the baby gear that we could possibly desire, but are we ready for night feedings and sleep deprivation and trying to comfort a toddler through a pretty massive change? Not sure. I guess we’ll find out pretty soon!
We won’t be doing it all on our though. We are looking forward to a visit from Jono’s parents and then from Marie’s mom shortly after our new baby is born. It will be great to get to spend some quality time with each of them before we say our goodbyes and head off to Central Asia.
Jonny Peace’s Piece
“Amen!” Everyone always laughs and gives me plenty of attention when I say that, so that’s one of my favourite words at the moment. Mama and Daddy invited some people over for afternoon tea and they set all sorts of yummy things on the coffee table, but even though I said “amen” over and over, they didn’t offer me any of the food which was very confusing to me. I love dancing and clapping and playing in the dry leaves on the other side of the cul-de-sac. I am equally fascinated by and wary of dogs, but I’ve found that a pretty effective way of getting them to back off is to bark back at them. Or hide behind Mama or Daddy.
To the Peacock family for being good landlords and great friends for the past two years.
Jono, Marie and Jonny Miller
Keep Looking Up
Continuing to post my poetry online. This poem was written during a period selling Amway in 1999.
There was a young man from Coonabarabran
Who lived with his grandma and great aunty Nan
He went to work and sweated all day
While they stayed at home and spent all his pay
This state of affairs did continue to exist
Until the day he decided to resist
He said this job is driving me crazy
And grandma and Nan are just plain lazy
I know what to do he jumped up and said
If you want to do something to get ahead
Go meet some people – go say gidday
Get paid for shopping – just join Amway
He went to a meeting and got all fired up
He dreamed a dream – saw the winner’s cup
And now he lives a fun life each day
And grandma and Nan can’t spend all his pay
There’s so much money and so much time
And this line of the poem just has to rhyme
He’s going diamond and having a ball
The secret was dreaming and not thinking small
© Timothy Miller 1999